The Diary
by Aeilde Light
Summary: Harry finds an old diary of his Mothers, and is shocked by the revelations within. This is a one shot story.


Harry cautiously made his way up the walkway and approached the door of number four, Pivet Drive. He hadn't seen this house since that night almost two decades ago, on his 17th birthday. He had received a letter almost a week ago stating that his aunt had found some of Lily's belongings mixed in a box with their parents things, and requesting that he retrieve them. It was a very formal letter, but he expected nothing else from his aunt and uncle. Harry rang the door bell and waited for only a moment before Petunia opened the door, saw him, and closed the door again. Harry stood there confused. It had happened so quickly, his hand was still raised to the buzzer. The door opened again and Petunia shoved a box out at him, simply stating, "Here," then closed the door again, leaving a rather bewildered Harry standing there.

Harry got the box home without incident and opened it up. He took out a few items that looked as though they had belonged to the grandparents he had never known and smiled, setting them gently aside. Most of the box contained old, broken quills, some torn parchment pieces with bits scribbled here and there in his mother's hand writing. He found a few pictures of Lily with her friends at Hogwarts, and set those aside with his grandparents things so he could frame them. Underneath the pictures was a small unmarked book. Harry picked it up curiously and opened it. It was filled with the tight and tidy writing of his mother; he was holding one of her old Diaries, likely one from her time at Hogwarts. He smiled to himself, and was about to put the book down when one of the pages caught his eye. He opened the book fully to read in large bold letters _"I'VE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE..."_ Harry furrowed his brow, knowing he shouldn't be reading his mother's old Diary, but his curiosity got the better of him...no one had ever mentioned Lily making any huge mistakes or being worried about anything in particular. He flipped back a few pages and began to read:

___*"I did something kinda stupid...but James was being a huge jerk. He just won't leave me alone, I mean sometimes he's charming, sure, but if he'd just realize that constantly asking me out like that was just digging his hole deeper...anyway, I asked out Remus to get back at him. Right in front of him! The look on his face was priceless, but I feel bad for Remus. He looked so shocked and embarrassed, and then Sirius just laughed and agreed for him to makes James squirm more. Oh well, I guess I have a date for Hogsmeade this weekend…"_

___*"Trip went well. Remus was a gentleman; though I think he doesn't like being by the shrieking shack much. He gave me a kiss on the cheek when we got back to Hogwarts. It was sweet. We made plans for next weekend too, just as friends…I think"_

_*"_**_I'VE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE…_**___I didn't mean for this to happen, but Remus was so sweet, and I could tell he liked me (probably has for a long time now) and, admittedly, part of me wanted to make James squirm more. How did this get so messed up? All I meant to do was kiss him, and then it all just…everything happened so fast. Before I knew it we were…I just…I don't know what to do…"_

___*"Just had the most awkward conversation ever. Remus and I agreed to pretend it never happened. He seems just as mortified as I am about it. He seemed frightened by himself…never mind. Better news.  
James pulled his head out of his arse and asked me out properly. I said yes.  
No one ever needs to know."_

___*"We're graduating soon! I'm so excited! James is going to take me home to meet his parents over the summer, I hope they like me. He's turning out to be a much better person than I ever gave him credit for…I'm even laughing at all the stupid jokes of his I used to hate. I think I might love this guy…"_

___*"I know this is a little fast, but we've moved in together! And he's proposed! I'm so happy! But with the war pressing on us from every side, we will likely have a very small wedding, and soon. I hope my parents can make it. To be honest, the war is really starting to frighten me, people are disappearing left and right and muggle borns aren't safe anymore. I'm worried for our future"_

___*"Now 'Mrs. Potter'. That's so weird to write! The wedding was small, really just the Order, but it was still the happiest day of my life!"_

___*"Oh no, I think I might…too soon to tell…"_

___*"James is ecstatic about the baby, and I'm happy too, I really am…but I'm worried. I think this baby might be further along than we think it is. And if it is, what should I do? He'll be devastated if he found out. And Remus, he might have a panic attack…  
Maybe I'm worrying too much. Of course it's James'…"_

___*"It's a boy! James wants to name him James the second, but I said 'hell no, I don't need two of you!' and he just laughed at me. I like the name Harry. James says he has my eyes."_

_*__"The baby's hair is coming in, and it's looking like its brown, not black, or red for that matter. I'm starting to panic, there's enough going on in the world and in our lives without adding this bit of drama. They're both risking their lives daily fighting for the order, and I think Remus is worried about ever having children, being what he is. No. For right now, I need to make their lives easier, make all our lives easier. It'll just take a hair coloring charm…Harry looks just like James now. He still could be James'. We can find out for sure later, when this is all over."_

_*"Went into hiding. Voldemort's looking for us actively. Dumbledore suggested a secret keeper charm and offered himself, but Sirius said we should use Wormtail. I agreed. I don't think Wormtail feels very useful lately…  
Anyway, Harry is happy as ever so is James for that matter."_

The writing ended there. Harry was unsure what to think…Remus…may have been his father? But everyone said he looked just like James! It couldn't be true…Harry loved Remus, but he had always been proud to be James Potter's son. Finding this out was exerting a paradigm shift on his whole existence. And if Remus was his father…Harry wished he had known this years ago, that he had known for sure who his father was all the way back in the third year…and if Remus had been his father, he could've known him that way, rather than as his father's friend…Harry sighed sadly. Regardless who his father was, knowing it now wouldn't change the past, and wouldn't change the fact he had grown up without his dad there. Harry wasn't even sure he blamed his mother for hiding the truth, she had been young, and scared, and wanted to protect those she loved the best way she could, but Harry still wished she had told someone, he might have a chance to know the truth that way…


End file.
